


You Can Pick Your Nose, and You Can Pick Your Friends, But You Can't Pick Your Friend's Nose (read this one if you don't know who the first one was about)

by orphan_account



Category: Green Day
Genre: Fluff, Legos, M/M, Nostrils
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-15
Updated: 2015-09-15
Packaged: 2018-04-20 21:02:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4802111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Billie Joe and Mike play with Legos, but what happens when Billie Joe goes too far?</p><p>this is the thing i wrote for parker, except i put a different ship in it, because why not?</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Can Pick Your Nose, and You Can Pick Your Friends, But You Can't Pick Your Friend's Nose (read this one if you don't know who the first one was about)

Billie Joe Armstrong and Mike Dirnt were playing with Legos. Thise was no particular reason. They just were playing with Legos how the heck do i start this thing aaaaah

“Mike,” Billie Joe said, “how many Legos do you think I can fit in my nose?”

Mike shrugged. “One, maybe. Or two, if I help stretch the hole for you.” He smirked.

Billie Joe blushed and shoved Mike. “Stop,” He said. “Okay, here. Look. If I can fit more than two, all by myself, then… um… then you have to buy me, um… cherry coke! You have to buy me cherry coke.”

“Billie Joe’s thirsty, huh?”

“Huh? Mike, no! Shut up. Act civilized, okay? Now, come on, watch me shove Legos up my nose.”

“Yeah, that’s real civilized alright.”

Billie Joe pouted and threw a Lego at Mike. “Shut up,” he said. “Okay, I’m gonna start.”

Billie Joe took a Lego and carefully pushed it into his nostril until it couldn’t be seen from the outside. He paused a moment. “Mike,” He said, “I just shoved a Lego up my nose.”

“Yep.”

“Mike, this wasn’t a good idea, was it?”

“Nope.”

Billie Joe swallowed. “Well, what do I do now?”

Mike shrugged.

“No, you know what? I’m going to put another one in, too. I’m gonna get three in, and I’m gonna win.”

“Whatever you say, Billie Joe.”

Billie Joe rolled his eyes and grabbed another Lego. He placed it outside of his slightly bulging nostril and slowly slid it up, wincing as he did so. He waited a moment and then grabbed a third Lego and brought it to his nostril.

“You know you can use the other side, right?”

Billie Joe blinked. “Huh?”

“You can use the other side if you want.”

Billie Joe bit his lip and nodded. He slowly slid the Lego into his other nostril and then looked back at Mike.

“Mike, there are three Legos in my nose.”

“Yeah, Billie Joe, there are.”

“I can’t breathe through my nose, Mike.”

“I can see why.”

“Mike?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I take them out now?”

Mike laughed and nodded. “Yeah, Billie Joe.”

Billie Joe reached his finger into his nose and tried to wiggle out the Legos. “Ow,” He said. He wiggled his finger around more, tying to grasp the Legos, but they wouldn’t come out. They scraped against the inside of his nose.

“Mike?”

“Yes, Billie Joe?”

“I can’t get them out.”

“Blow through your nose.”

Billie Joe nodded and shut his mouth tightly. He tried to exhale through his nose, but the Legos only slid down a tiny bit. They scraped harder against the inside of his nose, making his eyes water.

“Mike,” Billie Joe said, “they’re stuck. They’re really stuck. I don’t see how children find these things fun to play with.”

Mike laughed. “That’s because most people don’t shove them up their noses, Billie Joe. You want some help?”

Billie Joe nodded sheepishly. Mike moved closer to his and put his finger on the outside of the nostril with two Legos. He pushed down, but nothing happened. 

“Mike, that hurts,” Billie Joe said.

Mike put his hands back at his sides. “You probably should have thought of that before shoving three Legos up your nose, huh?”

“You could have stopped me!”

“Well, I could’ve, but this is really amusing, so I’m kind of glad I didn’t.”

Billie Joe shoved Mike. “What do I do?” He asked. “I can’t just leave them there!”

Mike thought for a moment. “Hang on,” he said. “I read an article online about this, I think. You have to blow really hard into the person’s mouth.”

“What?”

“Like, if a kid gets a Barbie shoe up their nose, the mom or dad, like, puts their mouth around the kid’s, and they blow really hard, and the shoe comes out.”

“That’s gross, Mike. That’s practically incest. That's, like, making out with your kid.”

“Yeah, but it works, right? Besides, you're not my kid. I mean, I might be your daddy, but you're not my kid, you know?”

Billie Joe sighed. “Just do it, then.”

Mike nodded. “Hold your breath.”

Mike put his mouth around Billie Joe’s and blew as much air into his mouth as he could. When he pulled back, there were three Legos back on the carpet. 

“Ow,” Billie Joe said.

“Is that blood on one of them?”

Billie Joe shrugged and stood up. “Who cares?” He asked. “I won. You owe me a cherry coke.”

“Billie Joe, your nose is literally dripping blood everywhere.”

“Yeah, and you owe me a cherry coke.”

Mike sighed. “Fine, Billie Joe,” he said. “But that’s the last time we play with Legos, okay?”

“I guess we’ll just have to play with other toys, then, right?”

Mike snorted. “Yeah, Billie Joe,” he said. “I guess we will.”


End file.
